No occasion. No reason. Tuesday.
I Miss You
Nothing happened. Nothing is wrong. I just kept thinking about you today and decided to do something about it.
Since I last saw you
give or take
Which is longer than it sounds.
What set this off
Something ordinary reminded me of you.
It was not anything. Someone laughed the way you do, three tables over, and I looked up before I could stop myself.
That is the strange part about missing someone properly. It does not arrive on the days you expect it. It ambushes you in a queue.
It is never the big things.
I do not miss the occasions. I miss someone making a noise in the next room. I miss handing over half of something without asking. I miss the specific way you say my name when there is nothing after it.
None of that survives a phone call, which is why I made this instead.
Recently, and for no reason
- This morning
The coffee thing
I made two out of habit and stood there looking at the second one like it had betrayed me.
- Last week
Your terrible advice
You were right, obviously. I have not told you that yet, so consider this the admission.
- Ongoing
The song
You put it on once, in a car, two years ago. It is still doing this to me.
You, at various points
On repeat
The one that keeps doing this
For whenever you need one
Good. Say it out loud rather than making a website about it. One of us should be normal.
You do not have to be impressive this week. Get through it badly if you need to. I will not be marking it.
You are easier to be around than anyone I know, and you have no idea that this is a skill.
Put the phone down after this one. Nothing at this hour is as bad as it currently seems.
Something underneath.
I nearly did not send this, because there is no occasion and I thought it would seem odd. Then I decided that was a stupid reason not to.
I am not sad about it.
I just noticed,
and thought you should know
that I noticed.
Small toast
Here’s to the boring days.
- To Tuesdays.
- To the half of things handed over without asking.
- To noise in the next room.
- And to seeing you sooner than planned.
One more thing
There is something in the post.
It is small and slightly stupid and you will know exactly why the moment you open it.
While I am at it
I am not very good at doing this in the moment. I think of the right thing to say roughly four hours later, usually on the way home.
So consider this the four-hours-later version, written down properly: you are the person I want to tell things to first. Not important things. Any things. That is the whole measure of it, as far as I can tell.
Come back soon. Or let me come to you. Either.
— thinking of you
No occasion.
No anniversary.
No reason at all —
except that it was Tuesday,
and I missed you,
and that seemed like enough.
That is all. Just that.
You can go back to your day now.
made on an ordinary Tuesday